A Tail of Two Piggies was, to put it simply, THE BEST EPISODE EVER!!!!! I was dying of laughter through the entire thing, and once it was over, I immediately wanted to watch it again; which, let me tell you, does not happen very often!
We open backstage at the premiere of Disney’s Zootopia, where Uncle Deadly is getting Miss Piggy ready to walk the red carpet wearing the first in his new fashion line, Uncle by Deadly. Things immediately go south though, as Deadly seems to have made the backline a bit too low, and Miss Piggy’s tail pops out, causing the press to have a field day.
The next day, this unfortunate wardrobe malfunction has caused massive media backlash, as well as attracted the attention of the One Million Angry Parents Association, who form a picket line outside Kermit’s office. Sam the Eagle seems to be the most upset by this whole ordeal, and tells Kermit he’ll be drafting an apology for Piggy to read on air. Kermit tries to tell Sam there’s no law against showing a pig’s tail, but Sam isn’t having it.
Meanwhile Rizzo and Pepé are trying to cheer Gonzo up, as it is the anniversary of the day that Camilla left him. To make matters worse, last night Gonzo found a box of Camilla’s stuff in his apartment, so he’s been having a really tough day. Pepé and Rizzo tell him that he needs to move out of the apartment; there are too many bad memories there, he needs to start fresh. Rizzo tells him that Big Mean Carl’s sister is a real estate agent, one of the best around, he could get her to find Gonzo a new place.
When Miss Piggy gets to work she is utterly humiliated. Uncle Deadly tries to cheer her up, telling her that what the world saw is perfectly natural, but it doesn’t help. She tells him that there is so much prejudice against a curly tail, she constantly has to downplay the fact that she’s a pig. Suddenly they are ambushed by the press, causing Miss Piggy to snort in frustration, making matters so much worse.
Later that day Rizzo and Pepé take Gonzo out to look at properties with Big Mean Carla, and right away it looks like they find the perfect one. There’s just one problem, the price. The house is amazing, but way outside Gonzo’s price-range. But as he explains this to Big Mean Carla, Rizzo and Pepé break in and ask if he could afford it if they all chipped in together. Gonzo loves the idea, and the three decide to become roommates!
Back at the studio, Sam is giving Piggy the apology she is supposed to read, but she doesn’t want to talk about it, she’s too embarrassed. When Sam leaves, she is approached by Sweetums, who has brought in a little girl who wants to meet her. It’s a piglet named Alynda, who tells Miss Piggy that she had recently suffered a similar wardrobe malfunction at school, and was ridiculed for it. But now, thanks to Miss Piggy, she’s not ashamed any more! Miss Piggy hugs the girl and announces to everyone that she’s done hiding. It’s time to take a stand! She’s a lady, AND a pig!
In the writer’s room, Gonzo, Rizzo, and Pepé are looking at carpet samples and planning a housewarming party for their new house. They’ve decided on a pool party, but they want to invite a lot of women. The only problem is, they only know like three women.
When Miss Piggy left Alynda, she got right to work filming an with the help of Uncle Deadly, a few other people, where she vows that on the next episode of Up Late, she’s going to “Unveil the tail.” The only problem is, she didn’t tell Kermit, and now the network president wants to talk with him.
When Lucy gets there, she tells him that he is not to let Miss Piggy show her tail under any circumstances. If she does, it will cost the network sponsors, and if the sponsors pull out, the lost ad revenue will be coming from their budget, and they will have to start firing people.
Kermit tries to tell Miss Piggy, but she’s already started redecorating. She got mugs with curly tail handles, and incorporated a tail into her set backdrop. Kermit tries to tell her it will mean firing people if she goes through with it, but word gets out immediately and the rest of the Muppets panic.
Miss Piggy doesn’t want to get anyone fired, but she’s thinking of all the little kids out there like Alynda, who are counting on her to show them it’s okay to be themselves. Kermit tells her that he doesn’t want them to have to compromise her message, so they need to think of another way. As they all talk, Kermit has an idea. He knows exactly how to fix this whole thing!
That night the show goes on as normal. After a game of Who Tweeted it? with Fozzie and Animal, Miss Piggy tells the audience that it’s now the moment they’ve all been waiting for. With Sam and two sponsors watching him, Kermit takes the stage to tell the audience that Miss Piggy has been forbidden from showing her tail on TV. As the audience begins to boo, Kermit clarifies, that they never said he couldn’t! He flips around to reveal a curly tail attached to his rear, and yells, “Unveil the tail!”
One by one the other members of the Up Late crew turn around to reveal that they’re all wearing curly tails too! As the audience goes wild, Miss Piggy introduces Joan Jett, who emerges to thunderous applause to sing Bad Reputation, while Rizzo, Pepé, and Beautiful Day Monster fling tails to the audience. As they throw the pig tails, Rizzo, Pepé realize that there’s a lot of ladies in the audience. Now they know where they can recruit guests for their pool party!
Later that night everyone has gathered at the party. While Kermit congratulates Miss Piggy, and Pepé smooth talks some random girl, Gonzo decides to dive off the top of the house. He lands face down on the cement, but in true Gonzo fashion, isn’t fazed by it a bit, and pops right back up. As he tells his friends how glad he is that all three of them together, Pepé tells signals him to turn around. He turns his head to see Camilla walking toward him. “Camilla?” Fade to black.
During the credits: Fozzie and Animal play another round of Who Tweeted it?
As I said at the top of this review, this episode was hilarious. I have absolutely no qualms about saying definitively that this was my favorite episode so far. It was utterly hysterical. So many amazing Muppet moments, including Big Mean Carl finally EATING someone! And to make it even better, he was eating Scooter! Scooter! I was dying!
Speaking of Big Mean Carl, let’s talk about Big Mean Carla. Yes, it was an easy joke. Big Mean Carla is basically Big Mean Carl with some bows and a slightly squeaky voice, and as soon as I heard last week that Big Mean Carl’s sister would be on the show I knew that they’d name her Big Mean Carla, but I didn’t care. I loved her, I thought she was great, and I hope she comes back sometime.
And can we just talk about Camilla for a second? Camilla is back! I’ve been saying for months that she needs to come back, and now she is! My Gonzilla shipping heart can rest easy. Gonzilla is a thing once more, and all is right in the Muppet world. Mostly… Still waiting on Miss Piggy and Kermit to get back together… Just don’t ask me to come up with another ship name. Gonzilla was easy; it practically wrote itself. I can’t even begin to imagine how I might merge Kermit with Miss Piggy and not make it sound like a disease of some kind. Kermiggy? Miss Kerggy? Ew. No thank you.
One of the things that got the biggest laugh out of me was scene featuring the One Million Angry Parents Association, a spoof of the fundamentalist group, One Million Moms, the group that invented a Muppet controversy last year, launching a boycott of The Muppets before it even premiered; without even watching a single episode. To see them getting called out on the show, without actually being mentioned by name, was so funny. One of the best lines was the joke about them “Rounding up” to get their name, as it has been pointed out many times, the group is comprised of far fewer than a million people.
Speaking of “Controversy,” there was actually a joke in this episode that I was rather shocked made it in, but it made me laugh out loud, so I thought I’d highlight it.
Miss Piggy: “My prep began weeks ago, with head-to-toe chemical peels, eyebrow freezing, and waterboarding.
Uncle Deadly: “Yes, Goop recommended it.”
“Miss Piggy: “I tell my waterboardist everything.”
Did they really just do a joke about torture? Like most of the Muppet’s “Adult” humor, I’m totally not offended, and it was actually very funny, but I’m still surprised they actually went there.
As usual, this episode was chock full of great lines, and actually a lot more than I ended up choosing. Honestly, this episode was so funny, I could have easy transcribed half of it for my favorite quotes, but I decided to hold myself back and just go with the very best.
Deadly: *Nervously* “Oh, ha, ha, haaaaaaaa! She’s wearing Vera Wang!”
Chip: “Oh, I don’t see what the big deal is. I was born with a tail. The doctors removed it, but I keep it close so when I’m reincarnated, I’ll be whole, see?”
Big Mean Carl: “PUT THAT AWAY!!!!”
Sam Eagle: “The One Million Angry Parents Association are outside protesting right now!”
Kermit: “A million? I only see three of ‘em, Sam.”
Sam: “They like to round up.”
Rizzo: “Big Mean Carl’s sister is a real estate agent. Yeah, she got my brother a great place! There was a bidding war and she just ate the other buyer alive.”
Gonzo: “Oh, she sounds like a great negotiator.”
Rizzo: “No, no, I’m saying she ate him. While he was still alive. And then my brother got the place.
Miss Piggy: “Oh, Alynda! You’re right! You know what you just did? You just made me, inspire me, as much as I inspire you.
Fozzie: “Got it! Since we can’t do the one thing, and we can’t do the other thing, then all we have to do is think of a third thing, that makes everyone happy! You’re welcome!”
Zoot: “You know what? I’m nappin’ right now.” >Loud Snore<
Sam: “I’m warning you Kermit. The sponsors are here! If anything undignified occurs, we can say goodbye to our friends Big Oil, Big Pharma, and Big Diapers.
Sam: “Adult diapers. Sorry, Rick.”
Miss Piggy: “Oh my gosh, I’m trending! >Gasp!< I’m beating Malala!”
Without a doubt, A Tail of Two Piggies is my favorite episode so far. Not only did we get Muppet-on-Muppet consumption, a hilarious new character in Big Mean Carla, the return of the Muppet Newsman, a good helping of Uncle Deadly, and a ton of hilarious dialogue, we also got Camilla back! This show is on a roll! I can’t wait to see how they top themselves next!
What did you think of this episode? Are you excited for the return of Gonzilla?